Week 42: Arty Farty.

I like to be creative. Writing, drawing, doing crafts, dancing like no one's watching.

It doesn't mean I'm always good at it. Which can be a 'problem' because it stops me from doing it more often. Fear seems to be the block that stands in the way of so much we would like to do but don't. "I won't be good enough", "I can't do it", "It looks awful" ... these are the things we say to ourselves - to convince ourselves that there's no point in trying. I disagree. There is a point in trying. Actually, scratch that. There is a point in not trying but doing it anyway. Doing it simply because there's pleasure to be had in the process.

Sometimes, when we do something we love, just because we love it, we become so involved and immersed in it that everything else seems to drop away. This is a phenomenon known as 'flow'. Have you ever felt it? It can come on when we do anything, really. From cooking to surfing or running or anything in between or beyond. It is absolute mindfulness. It is divine.

This week, I may not come into contact with flow, but I will absolutely come into contact with my creativity. This week I'm going to get arty farty. I'm whipping out the pencils, crayons, arts and crafts. I'm going to do it simply because it's fun, not because I want to create a masterpiece. Flow, my friend, please feel free to descend upon me. But even if you don't, in those moments while I'm creating, I intend to forget about the dishes and the washing and the tax return that still needs to be completed. I'll be too busy getting my arty farty on.

Week 41 Update: Driving Without Distraction ...

This past week was the first week in a long, long time, that I didn't make or take phone calls while driving. I've long found that time on the road to be ideal for catching up on missed calls and long overdue contacts. Likewise, it was the first time in ages that I've not checked my phone at a red light - you know, just in case I'd missed something since the last red light.

The thing is, I don't really want to talk on the phone or check for messages at red lights. I find it a bit stressful. Another instance of trying to do too much at once. You might ask: "Why did you do it, then?". Indeed. I guess because, just like everyone else, time feels as though it's flying by. There's a lot to be done in a day, and seemingly not enough time to do it in ...

This week, when I put the phone away, turned off Bluetooth and just drove, it was a bit of a relief. No phone calls. No 'giving in' to that incessant urge to check the phone. No distractions.

Hang on ... About that last point. That's not quite right. No distractions? Hardly the case, unfortunately.

The truth is, despite the phone being out of the picture, there were still plenty of opportunities for distraction. My 18 month old son in the backseat for a start. But then there were my thoughts. Of what to make for dinner. What challenge to set myself next for this blog. What I might teach in yoga during the week. The meaning of life. My noisy, noisy mind set out to derail me at every opportunity. Oddly enough, I find this to be moreso when I'm pregnant (as I am now). Why, I'm not so sure. But it seems to be so.

Well then, what to do? I think putting the phone away is a good start. As for my mind, I think I'll have to keep on that one: focusing my attention away from those incessant thoughts and back onto the task at hand - driving.

Week 41: Drive Time.

I know I'm not the only one guilty of using time in the car driving as 'down' time. It seems like a great opportunity to catch up on phone calls because, all of a sudden, we're not busy. Hmm... there's something wrong with that logic. We are busy. Very busy in fact. Busy driving. Busy keeping ourselves and those around us safe from the damage that can come from distraction on the road.

Sometimes I shock myself by how easily I will make a call (hands free of course) while driving. I'll even check my messages at a red light. But every time I do that, my mind shifts from what it should be doing - driving. And even though I might think I can do both things at once - talk and drive or check a text and then let it go until I have a chance to deal with it later - the truth is that my attention has been diverted and confused. I'm not as present as I could be (to either thing).

Just because I've been driving for over a decade doesn't mean I'm immune to making stupid decisions, not seeing an oncoming vehicle or a red light. I'm no superwoman. I'm not shielded from danger by some invisible energy field. When I look into the rear view mirror I'm reminded that it's not only my own safety I'm in charge of - it's that of my son in the back seat (and, now, the baby in my belly), too.

So, this week, I'm turning off my Bluetooth, I'm putting my phone out of sight, and I'm focusing on driving.

In the words of my son: "Beep, Beep!".

Week 40 Update: Three Minutes: Teeth, Distraction and ...

Three little minutes (probably less, actually). Time to focus on one thing - just one thing. Brushing my teeth. It should be easy, right? I mean, three minutes - that's nothing. If my attention span is so short that I can't focus on my teeth for three minutes then something's not quite right ...

Well then ... something's not quite right. It was hard work this past week to focus on nothing but brushing my teeth. I mean, I could put away a bunch of folded washing in that time. I could check my emails or Facebook. I could put on my socks. Still, I persevered. I was just surprised by how hard it was.

I think I'm going to use my teeth as an ongoing reminder. Three minutes, twice a day to act as a warning sign. If I'm struggling to focus for that long, I'm trying to do too much. I'm not being mindful.

I think this week was a good reminder for me that being mindful takes practice, perseverance and isn't always easy. Even when the 'task' seems utterly straightforward.

Week 40: This Is The Way I Brush My Teeth.

Brushing my teeth has always seemed like a chore. All that paste, all that foam, all that buffing and polishing ... those precious three minutes in which I could be doing something else. Actually, usually I am doing something else, like checking in on Facebook or taking a quick peek at my emails. Maybe I'll throw some clothes back in the cupboard or put on my socks. Rarely do I brush my teeth simply to brush my teeth.

I had to stop and think about this though: brushing your teeth is supposed to take about three minutes (I'm sure I heard this somewhere). Aren't those three minutes an ideal time to practice mindfulness? I wouldn't be shocked if my teeth ended up cleaner as a result, and maybe that pesky issue of receding gums would be reduced if I didn't just bash away at the task without any thought.

Three minutes, twice a day. Surely not too hard.

Mindful oral hygiene.

A mini meditation. The foam is just a bonus.

Week 39 Update: Dance, Dance, Dance!

You know that saying: "Dance like no one's watching"? I've always loved it. Whenever I read it it sends a tingle of freedom and empowerment up my spine. Why is it such a delicious, heart expanding sentence? Because for some reason, sometime between childhood and adulthood we become seriously self-conscious and put a heavy ol' lid on our impulsive, innate urge to dance.

My 18 month old son and I have danced together a lot this week. Watching him is nothing short of joyful. He hears the music and he dances. He breaks it down like no one's watching - because, he couldn't care less if they were! He feels the beat, he feels the urge, he does what feels good. I'm sorry I've lost that carefree-ness somewhere along the track. In fact, I know I lost it behind me on the path somewhere long, long ago. For as long as I can remember, the dance floor has been a place of serious unease. I don't like to dance in public; I look ... silly. Yet, maybe it's because I'm getting older, or maybe it's the impact of motherhood, but somehow - slowly, slowly - this self-consciousness is dimming. I'm still not likely to lead my husband or my friends onto the dance floor, but if they invited me I might be a little less reluctant to join them.

This metaphor, if I can call it that, of dancing extends well beyond the dance floor. This week I've been thinking about how and where else I'm held back due to fear, self-consciousness, doubt.What I've found is that this idea of 'no one's watching' or of there being no consequences (social awkwardness for a start) is an interesting and empowering way to cut through my fears. Who cares who's watching? Well ... we all do to some extent, but I, for one, plan to shrug it off more often.

Dancing is one seriously fun and empowering way to experience the present moment, to practice mindfulness. I've cut some pretty mean moves this week ... of course no one but my son had the pleasure of witnessing them. You'll just have to trust me ...

Still, if you do happen to see me busting some moves around and about, I don't care if you think I look silly or not!

Week 39: This Body Was Made for Dancing.

I had the absolute pleasure of spending the weekend at a yoga workshop. I could natter on about how amazing it was for a long time, but I'll spare you all that and get to the point: Dancing.

The teacher announced that we were going to free-form dance. Two things happened for me simultaneously: my stomach dropped in horror and my heart filled with excitement. I felt instantly embarrassed about having to be so free and open and potentially vulnerable, while also feeling the energy that comes with the promise of an experience that has the power to transform. In any case, fear or otherwise, I gave myself wholeheartedly to the activity. And it blew my mind. I wanted to cry, I wanted to keep moving, I wanted to understand the barriers that broke down - the way I became so present in myself that I didn't care what anyone else was doing, who was watching and how 'silly' I might look.

It was possibly the most profound experience of mindfulness I've experienced in a long time. I was moved - literally.

That absolute presence I experienced - delicious. The feeling of my body moving in space with no barriers, no restrictions and no self-consciousness - divine.

So this week there's going to be dancing. Every day, just dancing.

Me, the music, the moment.